Better...

I rode my road bike again today, it was the first time since the "fear incident" two weeks ago. I have to admit that I was making up all sorts of reasons to postpone this ride.. my parents visited us last weekend, I was too busy going to the market on Saturday morning, then I had to go grocery shopping on Sunday morning and later, I was too tired to go. Even this morning, it took me until 11am to get going and I had to force myself to go.

The truth is that I was scared to be scared and the feeling was paralyzing me.

I have been riding my hybrid bike to work a lot in the past two weeks. I've become more confident on that bike and I've seen my average speed go from 14 kph to 16 kph in the last two weeks [this includes the time I wait at red lights and stop signs]. My maximum speed has also increased, and I thought this was a good sign that I was becoming more comfortable being on a bike again.

The ride was fine this morning. I can't say it was fun, because I was a tiny bit scared. I'm proud to report that I did not have a panic attack and I did not have visions of accidents and painful injuries. It was a nice change. At one point, a little girl decided it would be a good idea to ride her bike parralel to the path just as I was passing her even if I had yelled that I was passing. I cursed at her, but I didn't hit her - thank God, or I would have gone over my handlebars again. After that incident, I became more nerveous and I decided not to push it. I rode 12.5K.

I saw my osteopath on Thursday and he worked on my sternum, which was very tight. He didn't put much pressure on it and it was hurting like hell! Just slightly touching it now hurts a lot. The osteopath thinks my body went into protection mode and closed the rib cage up to avoid further injuries. Now is time to relax a little and let my body go back to normal... I think I'm not out of the woods just yet.

I got the yellow light to go to the pool: I can go, but I have to take it very easy. If I have pain, I have to stop. I can deal with those conditions! :-)

The bad news is that I will not be ready to do the Last Chance Triathlon in three weeks. I kinda knew it would come to this, given that I only got the yellow light to start swimming again, given my bike fear and given the pain I felt when I ran to catch the bus on Thursday. It really sucks, but I'm really zen about it. This is just the way it is for me this year.