This thursday is round 2 of PRK laser eye surgery for me. My vision has never been perfect since the surgery in December 2006, and it has regressed a bit over the summer. I'm now at -1 and -1.25 plus some astigmatism still remaining, so I qualify for a free second round of surgery. Since the Summer, I knew and I hoped this day would come when I'd get another chance to get perfect vision, but now that it's upon me, I'm very anxious about it. I remember every little annoying detail of the surgery and the few days afterwards and I'm not looking forward to it. I'm so anxious that I tend to forget the prize for getting the surgery: a better vision.
All this stress, added on top of the stress and frustration from my job make me physically sick. I've been having digestive issues since last Wednesday, and i'm already down 4 lbs. It all started with a strange feeling while I was driving to Montreal about 10 days ago. All of a sudden, I felt as if I was going to faint while at the wheel, and it felt like blood was rushing through my brain. Then, on Wednesday, I had a migraine, for the first time in 2 years. :-( It was then that I realized that I had been feeding my body very poorly in the past couple of months and my body was telling me "Enough!"
I've been eating almost perfectly in the past couple of days and didn't get any more headaches. I'm hoping that I learned my lesson and that I'll be more careful with what I eat from now on. In the process, I hope to be losing a few pounds and keep that weight off. However, I hope I won't have to go through what I've been through the last time... I'll do everything I can to avoid it.
My running training is going well. I ran 9K yesterday! :-) Swimming is not going so well and I'm a little discouraged and a little stressed. I'm not sure I can swim 500m in 20 minutes or less at the Early Bird Sprint Tri and I'm afraid I'll look like a loser if it takes me 25 minutes. So, I stress about it. Very clever. ;-)
Sunday, February 03, 2008
104 days from today is my first Sprint Tri. Self-doubt is creeping in tonight... Can I really swim 500m non-stop on May 17th? I had my fourth Pre-Masters course tonight. It was tough and I'm a bit discouraged. I know that 104 days is a lot of days to practice and improve, but I'm doubting my abilities tonight... just like I was doubting my abilities to swim 200m a year ago.